I don’t even know where to start with this year end review. I think the easiest way to do this would be to divide this review into two sections. My family life and my business life have both been quite the rollercoaster this year…
Personally, this year has been one of the best years for my family. We will definitely cherish 2020 in the way that it brought us our Hazel(nut). She has been such an amazing blessing to our family, completely rounding us out. She’s the perfect addition. It was pretty intense right before her arrival. I was very uncomfortable, nervous about giving birth during a global pandemic, worried about my family’s health, mentally wrapping my head around all the civil injustices and civil unrest our country was going through. Just when my heart was starting to really sink at our situation, Hazel made her grand debut. She’s been everything we need to handle this pandemic with a huge smile and full heart. I don’t know how we could have done it without her.
I was, and I continue to be, so worried about how to manage being a parent during this crazy year to an active curious toddler, during a year full of huge changes for her. As far as the pandemic, I know everyone says children are resilient, and they are to some degree. But I wanted her to feel safe to be sad, frustrated, and even mad about any of these crazy situations. She is very aware that her life has changed big time and she expresses that to us. I know we are doing our very best under the circumstances to give her a normal childhood, help her continue to grow and learn, and nurture the beautiful person she is. She has somehow, under these crazy conditions, thrived! I am so proud of her. Becoming a big sister was actually an easy transition with her because she ended up having two parents at home with her instead of feeling the huge change in decreased attention from me most of the day. Drew was working from home since the start of this and so Evelyn was able to have a parent available to her while the other one tended to the baby. Silver lining I guess. I know there will be a transition for her when Drew goes back to work in the office but I think she will be flexible and understanding. We are lucky enough that our school district was able to reopen and she’s been able to attend preschool in person. That has been a huge positive in her life and I feel so blessed that she’s been able to have that during this time.
Drew and I have always been a great team. We really enjoy spending time together and with two (even one kid), it’s been hard to find that time together. When Drew started working from home, we were both genuinely curious if we would burn out of each other. Look, I want to be authentic, there were a few times we were grateful I had a studio one of us could escape too. However, it really was only a few times. The majority of the time, we really loved having the time to be together as a family. Adding a new family member is a huge change to dynamics, roles, and how a family will function. We were able to focus on finding how to make this work for us without the pressure of him going back to the office. I am a huge advocate for long maternity times and also paternity time off as well. Our entire life needed a “pivot” (word of the year) and I’m grateful I had my awesome teammate by my side. We have always been able to come together during some of our darkest moments (family death, house fires…just to name a few) and we felt this year was actually one of the easier years for our marriage.
While family life seemed for the most part, blissful…the business has had a crazy year. We started off with a bang and things were looking great for us. I had been planning and setting things up so that I could take a real maternity leave finally. When everything shut down and weddings cancelled, I had to refund so many orders. It was scary not knowing how things were going to work out. Drew works in the biomedical field and I had been following the news about COVID since January in China, we both didn’t see this ending anytime soon. So we immediately jumped into our pivot. Started working with new planners, creating new products, and rebranded to keep us motivated. It hasn't been pretty and there have been more than a couple of times where I wondered if this should just be the end. I don’t think either of us have ever worked this hard in both of our careers. Long and hard discussions have been had, we’ve been realistic with ourselves. But we made it this far. I see a light at the end of the tunnel and I am going to keep pushing.
Since owning my business, every single order has been a “do a boogie” moment for me. I can’t tell you how excited I get for EVERY SINGLE ORDER I get. This year though, each order meant SO much more. It wasn’t just a dance, it was a huge sigh of relief. A little light during a really dark storm. Each order gave me hope that next year, I would still be doing what I love.
Like everyone else, this year was a rollercoaster for us. But Hazel, hands down, makes it a complete win. I could get very philological about all the lessons I think we were meant to take away from this year, but ultimately…it is gratitude. And I am more than thankful for this very blessed year.
2021…bring it.
Extremely grateful for all these gorgeous photos captured by Hanh Nguyen Photography.
Evelyn and my gorgeous outfits are from Morning Lavender.
